Tag Archives: health

The Ultimate Offensive Weapon

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tortilla-chipsAt breakfast this morning I announced that I am no longer buying tortilla chips.  My husband and I can’t handle having them in the house.  Period.

This may seem extreme – and if you saw my pantry, you might think that I am.  It holds no sandwich cookies, no breakfast pastries, no peanut butter with sugar added.  Most of what you’ll find there is pretty darn healthy.  It’s not that we are saints when it comes to our food choices.  It’s that I understand that it’s better for me to be an abstainer versus a moderator.

Gretchen Rubin, author of the book The Happiness Project and blog by the same name recently asserted, “More people would benefit from abstaining,” than from thinking that they can consume one or two of [insert naughty food of choice] and then simply quit.

This being true – at least for me – then it’s best to have the chips stay on the shelf at the grocery store versus having them taunt me from my pantry shelf at 8:00PM each night.

Not buying chips is what Roy F. Baumeister and John Tierney describe in their book Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength as an implementation plan.

It’s easier to resist the temptation to go into debt if you enter the store with a firm implementation plan, like, If I shop for clothes, I will buy only what I can pay for with the cash in my wallet.  Every time you follow this kind of rule, it becomes more routine, until eventually it seems to happen automatically and you have a lasting technique for conserving willpower: a habit.

As they go on to say, “Precommitment is the ultimate offensive weapon,” and I am precommitting to abstain from chip eating.

We’ll see how that goes.

Coaching: Honesty

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As stated earlier in the week, honesty is a tough subject to take on because most of us see ourselves as honest people.  That said, most of us likely recognize that we have room for improvement in this area as well. I suppose that may be true for many of the topics tackled here.  As always, I invite you to really think about your answers and write them down if that makes the exercise more powerful for you.

Here we go…

Starting with yourself first, what area needs a more honest look?  These usually are areas that we’re avoiding – like my example of avoiding the scale because I didn’t want to honestly know what my weight was.  What are you avoiding so that you don’t have to really know about or deal with?  Your finances?  Your boss?  A coworker?  The scale?  How can you lean into your discomfort and make a true assessment of reality?  Once you know where you are, you can better define a new path to make changes.

Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise. ~Sigmund Freud

Moving on to the definition of “honest” and what that really means, how has it changed for you after reading the posts this week?  Did you, like me, see honesty as simply truth-telling?  When have you shared a truth with intentions that weren’t pure and upright?  Would you handle it differently now?  How?

Sometimes it’s good to look at ourselves and figure out how we can make some honest changes.  Of course, that requires that we have the courage to be honest with ourselves.

Visit the Breakthrough Strategies website!

Priming Your Motivation

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Each day an email lands in my inbox from Eat This, Not That, priming me to make healthier choices each day.  It works.

Advertisers learned long ago that priming is the foundation of what makes ads work.  Priming also plays into our motivation.  Good or bad.  For example, studies have shown that simply saying words that are associated with being old (Florida, raisins, wrinkle, etc.) makes youthful adults act old.

Taking the time to observe the environment around us may uncover many things playing into motivation levels.  What might be impacting your life without you knowing?  Drawing from Creating Your Best Life, here are a few:

  • Sad movies
  • Photographs and names of supportive people
  • Achievement pictures
  • Junk-food advertising
  • Music (can be positive or negative)
  • Words (as mentioned above)

Now that you know this, the key is to create your own primers to aid motivation.  A few that work for me are the above mentioned newsletter, setting passwords to reflect my goals, and creating a visual “Primers” board on Pinterest.  Some additional creative suggestions, again from Creating Your Best Life, are:

  • Fantazein clock: flashes messages as goal reminders
  • New email address: I use my passwords instead as they change more often
  • Vanity license plates
  • Tattoos
  • Mobile ring tones
  • Happy pictures
  • Vision Boards

Remember that primes can also be negative, so be sure to look around to see if there are any anti-motivators at work as well.  Conflicting primes can also cause us to spin, whether we are aware of their power or not.

Priming is a way to remind us of our goals in creative and constant ways, motivating us to do what is important in our lives.

You can find all books mentioned in this blog online at the Coach Carolyn Store.

Where Did My Motivation Go?

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Where did it go?!  A month ago you were passionately pursuing goals you set for yourself.  You were making progress!  You were stunning even yourself.  OK, maybe for you it wasn’t a month ago… maybe it was two months ago after you set your New Year’s resolutions.  Or maybe it was a few years ago when you started a new job or began a new adventure.  In any event, remember that?

What was motivating you then and where did it go?

Maybe a better question is this: What knocked your goal(s) out of sight?

For some goals, I know very specific things that happen that cause me to lose my focus.  With exercising, I always lose my momentum when I get an illness that lasts more than three days.  It can be something as simple as a cold; but when I can’t breathe I can’t (or don’t want to) exercise.  It’s like I forget it was ever important to me and after a longer-than-it-should-have-been break, I start all over again.

The crazy thing is that I know this about me; know it’s likely to happen.  And yet, it happens again and again.  How much easier is it to lose motivation when something unexpected happens?  And how much longer does it take to recognize that it’s occurred?

It starts with a day where we are simply “off;” where focus seems impossible and perhaps even futile.  Then another comes after that one where we force ourselves to do what we must, but our heart is somewhere else.  And after that it seems we’re simply going through the motions.  Our goals are out of sight… and when they do come into focus, they seem to be impossible to achieve.

Where did the motivation go?  What next?

We’ll explore that this week.

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How To Hire A Coach

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Celebrating International Coaching Week by sharing some details about my profession has been fun for me and I hope educational for you.  We’ll close it out with a discussion regarding how to go about finding a coach who is right for you.

Coaching is an unregulated profession and anyone can call himself or herself a coach.   In the 2012 ICF Global Coaching Study released this week, coaches worldwide expressed concern regarding untrained individuals in the field and the marketplace confusion this causes.  It all comes down to this – when you as a client are choosing a coach, it’s up to you to do your homework.

The International Coach Federation recommends that potential clients ask the following questions of any prospective coach.  Regardless of whether one decides to hire an ICF coach or not, the questions are good ones.

  • What is your coaching experience (number of individuals coached, years of experience, types of coaching situations, etc.)?
  • What is your coach-specific training (enrolled in an ICF approved training program, other coach-specific training, etc.)?
  • What is your coaching specialty or areas in which you most often work?
  • What specialized skill or experience do you bring to your coaching?
  • What is your philosophy about coaching?
  • What is your specific process for coaching (how sessions are conducted, frequency, etc.)?
  • What are some coaching success stories (specific examples of individuals who have succeeded as a result of coaching/how the coach has added value)?

After having a conversation that includes answers to these questions and a discussion of hoped-for outcomes, you should have a pretty good idea if the coach you are interviewing is a good “fit” for you.  Even if the answers to the questions align with what you are looking for, if there isn’t a “fit” between you and your coach the relationship will likely not work out as well as it otherwise would.

You can dive deeper into the ICF Tips For Hiring A Coach for more information.

So, You’re A Life Coach?

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“So, you’re a life coach?”

I always hesitate a little before I answer this question because no, I’m not a life coach.  However, our careers and professions are our lives, too… so yes, I do coach about life.  This particular niche of coaching can be a little murky.  I’ll try to help clarify a bit.

Many people equate life coaching with the profession of coaching as a whole.  As I mentioned yesterday, there is a broad spectrum of coaching areas and even within the niche of personal coaching there are many deeper specialties as well.  With regard to life and personal coaching, the International Coach Federation outlines the following focuses that a personal coaching engagement might delve into:

  • Life Planning
  • Life Vision & Enhancement
  • Extreme Self Care
  • Spirituality
  • Relationships (Singles, Couples, Families, etc.)
  • Health & Fitness
  • Creativity
  • Financial Freedom
  • Organization
  • Children/Teens/College Students
  • Attention Deficit Disorder

Reviewing this list, it’s easy to understand how it would be more beneficial to find a coach specializing in the area one hopes to improve in, like financial freedom or ADD, versus finding a coach who hasn’t focused on a niche.

So no, I’m not a life coach – but I can help you find a good one.

Connect with me on Facebook: Coach Carolyn

Coaching: Planning Forward

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Do you spend time looking forward?  Or perhaps a better question is this: do you spend time planning forward?  Most of us have plenty of dreams, but what is the course being charted to get there?  Hope is lovely; however, it needs a plan to accompany it if any forward movement is going to happen.

Today, take a moment to face the future, gain clarity about where you want to go, and take a step forward on the path in front of you.

Here we go…

What have you been thinking that you would like to give up?  How can you turn the goal into one that will move you forward?  There are examples in Tuesday’s post to help you get started.  Try rephrasing the goal and remember that it should be specific and challenging as well.

Spend some time listening to what you say to others.  How much of your conversation lies in the past?  How much of your current circumstance do you blame on others?  What accountability do you take for your current situation?  Accepting accountability gives the power to understand how to take control going forward.  Find ways to believe that you can make the changes you want to make regardless of what anyone else does.  Then set some goals to move forward.

When we set our eyes on the horizon, what’s behind us becomes less powerful and we are more able to control where we are headed.  Set the course and move forward.

Notice a change?  The graphic above is part of the logo for my new company name:Breakthrough Strategies.  You can learn more about the name change and services Breakthrough Strategies offers HERE.  

Coaching Challenge: Your Mood

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How did you do this week?  Was your mood a positive one in a week when we’re all supposed to be depressed, sad and down?  Hopefully the posts here helped serve as a reminder that you can choose to be in a good mood, regardless.

This week’s coaching challenge centers around this idea: you have the power to change your mood.  Think each of these through and grab a couple as your own as you move forward.

Here we go….

  • Did you set a New Year’s Resolution?  If you’ve already slipped off course, resolve again to take it up.  Look at it as misstep versus a failure.  You have a year to complete your goal, after all.  Keep going!
  • Take time to recognize what sort of mood you are in.  Don’t usually pay attention?  Set a reminder at the same point in time each day for a week and record it.  Remember this baseline as you work to improve your mood.
  • Next time you are enjoying your bad mood, call yourself on it.  It’s difficult to be upset about something and then turn around and be nice to those around us.  Choose to drop the attitude and move on to a better place.
  • Review the Mood Boosters post – or find another list online – and choose a go-to mood booster.  Decide ahead of time how you will routinely pull yourself out of a bad mood.
  • Smile at a stranger each day.

I travel light. I think the most important thing is to be in a good mood and enjoy life, wherever you are. ~Diane von Furstenberg

Find me on Facebook: Coach Carolyn

Mood Boosters

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In support of this week’s suggestions that you can, and should, choose to be in a good mood, here are a few ways find your way out of the doldrums.

  • Music.  This post in PSYBlog shares all the ways music can lift our mood.  But you knew this one, didn’t you?
  • Physical exercise.  A search on “Exercise and Mood” will return thousands of results supporting that exercise makes for a better mood.  One of my favorites is this one from USA Today citing research that found that the good mood created by exercise actually sticks around for up to 12 hours.  12 hours!
  • Pick up (or click on) a photo album.  Caroline Adams Miller shares in Creating Your Best Life that savoring happy memories makes us happy.  This one is great because so many of our happy memories are easily retrievable now on our phones or on Facebook.  And who can stay grumpy when the faces of our loved ones are smiling at us?
  • Smile.  “According to many experts, smiling may not only be an outward manifestation of a happy feeling. It may actually be able to cause a happy feeling. It’s the exact opposite of how most people see the smile-happiness connection, but with a growing body of evidence supporting the effect, it seems there may be something to it.”  Does Smiling Make You Happy? ~TLC
  • Figure out what is within your control.  As mentioned on Monday, discovering what we are able to control and taking steps toward getting there provides a sense of direction and tosses worry out the window.

There are many, many more ways to boost your mood.  Figure out what works for you and do it next time a bad mood comes around.

You can find all books mentioned in this blog online at the Coach Carolyn Store.

How’s Your Mood?

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This originally posted in August as How’s Your Attitude; I revised it slightly after comments from a reader.  I like it better now….

How’s your mood today? Mine’s better than it was last week… now that I’m paying attention to it! Funny, I also feel better too. Better physically. Better emotionally. Better about my business. Better about my relationships. All because I’m choosing to have a better attitude.

Kind of crazy, isn’t it?

We can spend a lot of time thinking that our moods are due to what’s happening to us. However, more science supports that our moods about how we are responding to what’s happening to us. Our choice. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I find that a little irritating. I don’t always want to have control of my mood – I want to blame someone or something else. Of course, that’s usually when I’ve already taken on a bad attitude.

Our attitude not only affects the relationships around us (anyone called you “grumpy pants,” “sour puss,” or something less flattering lately?), it can impact physical ailments like back pain, heart health or depression. Just do a quick search on WebMD and you’ll find all sorts of support for why we should choose to be cheery.

So what to do when we’d rather wallow in our bad attitude instead of giving it up? I’m sure you won’t be surprised… Turns out many of the things that affect our attitude are the very same happiness boosters already discussed here over the last few months.

Take a walk. Laugh. Call a friend. Pet your cat. Call an end to your pity party.

You know you’ll feel better. And your heart, back and mind will thank you for it. Not to mention the people around you as well.

Now you can follow me on Twitter!

Trust Yourself

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This week’s topic – trust – is so big I’m not quite sure where to start.  Last week a friend suggested trust as a topic and as she said it, I couldn’t believe we hadn’t spent time on it here.  OK, a little.  But not much.

Which is astounding, really, given how important trust is.  In business, in our relationships, in just about any interaction we have with another human being, how much trust we bring and give has an amazing impact.  We need trust.  We need to trust others.  And we need to trust ourselves.

Perhaps that’s the place to start: ourselves.  If we don’t trust ourselves I’m pretty sure we won’t be able to trust others.  It just makes sense.  So what does trusting yourself mean?   I think it comes down to two things.  Do you trust that you’ll make good decisions for yourself?  And do you listen to your gut?

When I first started my own business it was difficult for me to make decisions on my own.  Having not been in business before, I didn’t really trust that I’d do it right if I didn’t have input from others.  I’m pretty sure I made my husband a little crazy with my constant questions about what business card design I should choose or whether I should get one software program versus another.  After a few months I realized that the business is MINE and so I’m the one that needs to call the shots, take the risk and trust myself enough to make the call.

Which ties into trusting my gut.  Of course, to trust ourselves we must first take time to draw on our knowledge and instinct.  Moving too fast can result in untold misery as our gut checks in after the decision has been made – and makes us feel a little sick.  Science is just beginning to pay attention to what they call the gut’s “second brain” as the link between our heads and our stomachs has been found to be more than just hunches and intuition.  That “gut feeling” you have about something, it may just be your second brain trying to tell you something.

What it comes down to is that we need to be brave.  When deciding to do something, we need to move through our fears and trust that we have the ability to move forward confidently in the direction we’ve decided to take.  Conversely, when we decide to not do something, we need to trust our misgivings and believe that another opportunity will present itself even though we have to let this one pass us by.

Ultimately, you know what’s best for you more than anyone else.  Trust yourself.

Now you can follow me on Twitter!

Track Your Progress

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Departing from the usual Friday format, today’s post focuses on one last tip to make New Year’s resolutions stick: track it.

It’s almost common knowledge now that keeping a food journal helps keep off the pounds.  In the same way, tracking progress toward any goal bolsters our willpower and serves as a reminder of promises made to ourselves.

This obviously compliments yesterday’s recommendation to make sure resolutions are measurable.  Tracking tools can be as simple as a pen and notebook or an Excel spreadsheet; however, there are many tools available to track just about anything one could imagine striving toward.

I was introduced to Quantified Self within the pages of Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength by Roy F. Baumeister and John Tierney.  As you will read on the site, quantifying one’s self isn’t for everyone and I agree.  Keeping track of every little thing that I do isn’t something that I’m interested in.  That said, for those goals that we’re serious about reaching, having something to remind us –to keep us honest with ourselves – can be quite helpful.

Over the past year I’ve begun to quantify many more activities in my life.  I have found it to work for me.  Beyond that, research shows that it will probably work for you, too.

So clip on a Fitbit, download the RunKeeper app, check out Mint, track the books you’ve read at LibraryThing, print out a calendar to track your progress each day or track whatever goal you can dream up with Goal Buddy. (I’m not endorsing any of these products as I haven’t tried them all… you’ll need to assess their effectiveness on your own.)

Ultimately, the important thing to remember is that a New Year’s resolution is really setting a goal for your self in the New Year.  Set a good goal and you’ll set yourself up for success.  As luck would have it, I’ve written about goal-setting a lot over the last year; for more information you can read other posts and find within them recommended reading as well.

Now, go set that resolution!  Tell others what your resolution is.  You’ve got what it takes to do what you know is best for you!  Make it happen.

And have a very happy New Year!

You can find all books mentioned in this blog online at the Coach Carolyn Store.

That Which Cannot Be Measured…

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That which cannot be measured cannot be achieved.  ~Locke & Latham

It makes sense, doesn’t it?  If no measurement is set, how will one know when a goal has been met?

Do you want to be healthier?  How will you know when you’ve achieved that?

Perhaps you plan to spend more time with your kids?  How much time?  A few minutes a week?  An hour a day?

Have you made a resolution to exercise more?  How much more?  If you walk for 10 minutes a week have you done what you hoped to accomplish?

Or maybe you want to improve your performance at work.  What part of your performance?  If you get to the office on time does it count?  Or do you need to get your MBA?  Or increase your sales by 8%?

There’s a little wiggle-room in this measurement “rule,” as our long-term goals can be less specific – think of those in terms of vision and dreams.  But when it comes to those things we hope to achieve in the near-term, unless the goal is measureable there’s really little point in setting it at all.

So, how will you measure your success?  When will you know you’ve achieved your goal?  Be specific.  Measure it.

I’ve set a specific goal to get to 200 fans on Facebook by the end of 2011.  Help me get there!  ~Coach Carolyn

Approaching Your Future

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Earlier today I read an opinion column in USA Today about looking ahead to the New Year versus reminiscing about the old one.  The piece is a little tongue-in-cheek but it makes a great point about how we go about looking at things – particularly when setting a resolution for the New Year.

Are you basing your new goal out of past regrets?  Examples might be losing weight because a few pounds held on over Christmas… or deciding to ditch your job because you were passed by for promotion… or resolving to exercise because you think you’ve been lazy.

What if resolutions were based on where you want to go instead?  I want to eat healthy.  I want to find a job I love that uses my strengths.  I want to move my body so I’ll be able to run a 5K this spring.

The difference is an approach to success versus an avoidance of failure.  It’s been said here before: If you want to move toward a goal, you need to set a goal as something to move toward.  Not only are approach goals more apt to be realized, they also result in improved wellbeing.

Thinking in terms of what you want to quit doing?  Figure out what it is you want to move toward instead and let that be your foundation for a good New Year’s resolution.

Need some help reframing your goal?  Share it with me on Facebook or Twitter and we’ll brainstorm together there!

Yes, Resolutions Work!

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There may still be some leftover turkey and cranberry sauce in the fridge and the decorations haven’t yet been put away, but it’s hard to not turn our thoughts quickly from the indulgences of the last several weeks to whipping ourselves into shape in the New Year.  Yes, I’m talking about New Year’s Resolutions.

First, let’s cut through the myth and get to the facts – resolutions work.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been researching for a blog post and found ill-informed articles stating that they don’t.  What they should be saying is, “they haven’t worked for me.”  Here’s the truth.  Research shows that a well-set resolution works.  In fact, they work very well.  Caroline Miller refers to a study in her book Creating Your Best Life that found “people who set New Year’s resolutions had a 46% success rate with their goals after six months, while those who set no goals had only a 4% success rate.”

While it’s obvious from this that it’s better to set a resolution than not, it also shows that 54% of people who set resolutions do not find success.  What makes the difference?  Going directly to the study mentioned above, the researchers suggest:

Successful resolvers used more self-liberation, stimulus control, reinforcement management, positive thinking and avoidance strategies to keep their resolution.  Nonsuccessful resolvers used more self-reevalution, wishful thinking, self-blame, and minimized threat than the successful contingent.

Most interestingly, desire to change did not make a difference in success or failure.  Wanting something to happen isn’t enough.

For those of you among the almost ½ of Americans who set resolutions, this week I’ll suggest a few pointers on how to be in the successful group this year.  After all, if we’re going to bother to set a resolution we should first resolve to set ourselves up for success.

Find me on Facebook: Coach Carolyn

Make Time For Friends

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There’s a lot of talk about spending time with family during the holidays – and our focus is often there.  That said, it’s also the time of year when we gather with friends because we have the excuse of holiday parties to meet up after weeks and sometimes months of not seeing one another.

We had the opportunity to join our friends at one of these events last night.  As our friends arrived all at once, the feeling that breezed into the house with them was so loving and warm.  It made everyone feel cherished and blessed all at once.

This sort of closeness doesn’t happen by chance.  We’ve been hanging out for quite a long while and we’ve all made a commitment to these friendships.  We’ve supported each other through cancer, divorce and loss.  We’ve made meals.  We’ve held each other and cried.  We’ve traveled together.  We’ve celebrated weddings, birthdays and graduations.  And we’ve laughed.  A lot.

I’ve never understood when people say that they would like to spend time with friends but they just can’t find the time.

Make time.

Not just because you will need these people sometime in your life – because you will – but because it’s to your benefit to have them in your life every day.  According to the Mayo Clinic, friendship

  • Increases your sense of belonging and purpose,
  • Boosts your happiness,
  • Reduces stress,
  • Improves your self-worth,
  • Helps you cope with traumas, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one, and
  • Encourages you to change or avoid unhealthy lifestyle habits, such as excessive drinking or lack of exercise.

So why is it that you don’t connect with your friends more often?  What will it take to make them a priority?

Make time to be a friend.

Now you can follow me on Twitter!

Happy 3rd Birthday, Mom!

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Today marks the third anniversary since my mom suffered a brain aneurism.  Her recovery has been remarkable and how else would I mark today except to share with you the incredible story of her extreme resilience.

Extreme Resilience (originally posted June 2, 2011)

Sometimes life really knocks us flat, does it not? A few years ago life pulled one of these numbers on my mom and, by proximity, our family as well.

We were living in Germany at the time and I was speaking to her on the phone as she returned home from the hospital. Suddenly she said she had a terrible headache and had to go. The next call was from my dad, explaining that the doctors in the ER weren’t sure what exactly had happened but “aneurism” and “burst blood vessel” were being thrown about. Next step was a life-flight to Fargo. And I was on my way back to the states.

Mom was then placed on another flight to St. Paul where we began waiting to see what the impact of the now-diagnosed brain aneurism would be. She lived and that was half the battle. Now there would be surgery and recovery unlike what any of us could imagine.

Her friends and family played an important part in her recovery and a part in the resilience she needed to move back to her new normal. In addition to the remarkable support given by my father, I think there were two key pieces that acted as a reminder to her to move forward. The first one was a little frivolous and silly, but my husband started to call Mom “princess” when she didn’t want to do something for herself or when she was a little whiney about having to walk down the halls. This helped get her to do one little thing after another – and with a smile on her face to boot!

More powerfully, at one point my brother told Mom to “take her life back.” She still repeats those words as she continues on her road to recovery, reminding herself that she hasn’t yet completed the journey and there is more to take back every day.

What a powerful and beautiful example of resilience she is to all of us! She’s back to work and exercising. She hosts family get-togethers. She does so many things that were overwhelming two years ago that we forget sometimes how far she’s come. Her last appointment in St. Paul revealed that her physical healing is complete.

Thank you, Mom, for being an incredible example of how to bounce back. I’m forever grateful that you did!

Three Blessings

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It’s Thanksgiving week here in the U.S. and as is our tradition, thoughts turn to all that we have to be thankful for in our lives.  Gratitude and thanks have been frequent topics here and regular readers know how strongly exercising gratitude contributes to our overall well-being.

Before I sign off for the week to enjoy time with my family, I want to leave you with another reminder of the power of gratitude.  I’m reading Martin Seligman’s most recent book Flourish, and in it he builds on the Positive Psychology movement with concrete, research-based activities each of us can do to not simply be happy, but to flourish.

Because we spend so much time focusing on the negative (we do, you aren’t alone on this one), taking time to focus on positive events in our lives helps to add balance.  Ready to improve your well-being?  Here’s what Seligman suggests:

Every night for the next week, set aside ten minutes before you go to sleep.  Write down three things that went well today and why they went well.  You may use a journal or your computer to write about the events, but it is important that you have a physical record of what you wrote.  The three things need not be earthshaking in importance (“My husband picked up my favorite ice cream for dessert on the way home from work today”), but they can be important (“My sister just gave birth to a healthy baby boy”).

Next to each positive event, answer the question “Why did this happen?”  For example, if you wrote that your husband picked up some ice cream, write “because my husband is really thoughtful sometimes” or “because I remembered to call him from work and remind him to stop by the grocery store.” Or if you wrote, “My sister just gave birth to a healthy baby boy,” you might pick as the cause “God was looking out for her” or “She did everything right during her pregnancy.”

Writing about why the positive events in your life happened may seem awkward at first, but please stick with it for one week.  It will get easier.  The odds are that you will be less depressed, happier, and addicted to this exercise six months from now.

This activity is appropriately called the “Three Blessings” exercise.  How wonderful to have time set aside each year and, if we commit, each day to count our blessings!  We have so many…

Happy Thanksgiving to you!  I’ll see you back here next week.

You can find all books mentioned in this blog online at the Coach Carolyn Store.

Up Your Game

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I routinely have the pleasure of working with people who have decided to up their game.  Either they’ve noticed they aren’t the star performer they once were, or their strengths aren’t being fully utilized in their current profession, or they simply got lazy and want to make a change.

The instructor on the workout DVDs I use reminds me to push myself to maximize my effort.  Use heavier weights.  Lift my leg two inches higher.  Finish all the reps.  Jump higher.  It’s a great point.  If I’ve bothered to do something, be something, create something,what would keep me from bringing all that I have to the situation. 

Set aside 45 minutes to exercise?  The time has already been commited, burn as many calories as you can.

Paid for a conference?  Put your phone away and attend every minute that you can. 

Taking a class?  This is the one opportunity you have to learn what’s being presented, pay attention.

Have a good job that you like?  Show up every day with all your energy.  Only sort of like your job but really need it?  Same goes for you.

If you’ve bothered to put on your exercise clothes, bothered to commit your valuable time to training, bothered to find a job… make the most of what you are doing.  Bring your best.  Push yourself to do more.  Up your game.

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Coaching Challenge: Vacation

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In making the case for taking vacation time, I hope a few of you began to think about adding this important piece to your health regimen.  To solidify it, here are a few vacation and traveling challenges for you to consider.

Here we go…

  • Schedule a day off.  Send the request to your manager today.  Have it coincide with a day your kids have off so you can explore a museum or zoo.  Or land it randomly in an upcoming week so you can spend a restoring day at a spa, driving in the country, or cross-country skiing in a city park.  Do what you want to do.  Feel your stress level go down…
  • Dream.  I find that when I dream of traveling, soon I am.  Buy a copy of a travel magazine or, better yet, subscribe.  (Budget Travel is one of my favorites – because I’m a bit of a cheapskate.)  Make a bucket list.  Sure, you might not get to all the places you want to go.  But if you dream about it, you may get to some.
  • Plan.  Have a dream spot in mind?  An event you don’t want to miss?  Friends or family you haven’t seen in too long?  How can you make it happen?  Figure out how much money and time it will take and then start working toward it today.  If you don’t start, the likelihood of your trip happening at all will decrease.
  • Find something in your community you haven’t done before.  Do it.
  • Get your passport.  You’re sure to never leave your country if you don’t have one.
  • Change your thinking.  Next time you hear yourself say, “I can’t afford to travel,” or “I can’t take time off from work,” say instead “How can I find the money to travel?” and “What would I have to do to plan time away from work?”  Get creative.  Allow the possibility.

That’s a lot to do!  You better get right on it if you’re going to get out of here anytime soon!